Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
