U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
