I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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