I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
At least life still wants to fuck me.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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