When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
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