what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
He did a backflip because drugs
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
