he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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