The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize