bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize
