: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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