when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
