HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize