If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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