there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize