STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
