Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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