is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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