I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
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