I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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