are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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