How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Randomize
