Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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