dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
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