your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Randomize
