i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
And then he peed in my hair
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