I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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