I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize