We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
