what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
