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I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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