i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
