Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Randomize
