You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
She bit a glass in half.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
