The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
