im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
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