they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
