He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize