I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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