I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Just puked most of my soul out..
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
