You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize