question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
