so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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