GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
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