Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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