Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
