trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
