i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
