Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize