Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
