Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
