I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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